Rewrite the Narrative
While my Writing Fiction to Heal method is a nuanced and beautiful approach to writing fiction to heal, I often tell people that they don’t need the workshop or to write a novel to see the healing benefits of writing fiction to heal. Even a single exercise can bring immense healing to the table. You can read the many posts I have on case studies and other exercises. But today, I want to give you an actionable exercise you can do on your own. This is the exercise I give my clients and/or potential students who are interested in the method. I encourage you to try it for yourself and see what comes up for you. I have also received permission from a client who is currently going through the writing fiction to heal method with me to share her examples with you so you can see it in “action.”
The idea behind this exercise is simple — what you’re going for is a shift in perspective in writing about a similar situation as yours, but without the emotional charge that comes from writing about your exact situation.
Step One:
Think of an adverse event/experience/situation that you have had in your life. A traumatic incident. A moment that affected the trajectory of your life, perhaps. I know it’s painful to “go there” but once you’ve finished with this exercise, you’ll feel a bit lighter than when you started. So continue to think about which memory/event/experience is burning for attention. Jot down the first and loudest descriptions that are coming at you around this memory/event/experience.
PATTI’S EXAMPLE:
I was locked in a garage for 8 hours once as a child. I was staying home from school that day because I was sick. I knew there were cans of Sprite in the garage fridge so I went to get one and somehow the door locked behind me. I was so scared that I would die in that garage with no heat, food, bathroom, etc. I had to wait until my older brother came back home from school to find me.
I was scared I was going to die
I was so cold
I was terrified of being in trouble
Step Two:
Brainstorm 5–10 scenarios that are similar but different from your memory/event/experience that would elicit the same kind of feelings or descriptions you had with your real-life memory/event/experience.
PATTI’S EXAMPLE
“Hiding” somewhere during a game of hide and seek and not being found
Being locked in a vehicle
Being kidnapped
Getting lost in a big place you’re not familiar with (mall, carnival, tourist place)
Vehicle breaking down in the middle of nowhere
Step Three:
Write a scene from one of the scenarios you brainstormed. Try to hold the emotions/feelings of the character and the conflict alongside your actual emotions/feelings of your memory/event/experience.
PATTI’S EXAMPLE
It was an honest mistake. We were at Disney World and I was so excited to see all my favorite characters. When I noticed Tinkerbell walking down one of the less crowded streets, I ran to catch up to her, but she was fast. She weaved in and out of the crowds, went into a store that connected to a bunch of other stores. I followed her in, but lost sight of her. When I emerged back on the street, everything looked different. I didn’t see my parents or my brother.
“Uh oh,” I thought. “This isn’t good.” I started yelling for my mom but I couldn’t see her anywhere. I thought maybe I could retrace my steps through the stores and back onto the street where I’d left them. But I must have not have remembered the way. I exited a store and I was even more confused. “What if they never find me?” I thought. “What if my family leaves without me?” I started to shake and cry and eventually, a woman with a Disney World tag touched my shoulder.
“Are you okay?” She asked.
I sniffled and nodded.
“Did you lose your parents?” She asked gently.
I nodded my head yes, embarrassed.
“It’s okay, sweetie. That happens to a lot of kids, here. Let’s get you back to your parents.”
She took my hand and led me to another building. She had me sit in a plastic chair while she spoke through a walkie-talkie. Then, I heard over the loud speakers:
“Would Patti Smith’s family please come to the Lost and Found building?”
It felt like an eternity, but finally, my parents and brother arrived at the building and scooped me up in their arms.
“Thank you for making sure she was safe,” my mother told the park lady.
“Happens more than you think,” she replied. “Glad to help reunite you.”
I could tell by my father’s expression that once the lady left, I was in big, big trouble.
“I’m sorry,” I said in a tiny voice. “I was just trying to talk to Tinkerbell.”
“I’m just glad you’re okay,” my mother said squeezing me.
My father looked at me and said, “never do something like that again. You scared the hell out of us.”
He was angry, but I gathered it was because he was scared.
But they’d found me and I was safe.
When I asked Patti how it felt to write this scene, this is what she said:
“Even though it was just a short little scene, I felt a bit of guilt release when I wrote it because I still remember to this day the look on my parent’s face when my brother told them how he’d found me. I suffered frostbite on my toes that had to be looked at and when we were at urgent care, I just remember my mom being so appreciative that I was okay, and my father was so angry that I put them in that position. I also have kept the emotions I felt from that day locked up tight — the fact that I felt like I was never getting out of the garage to be reunited with my family. That I was going to be lost to them forever. As an adult, I feel for that little girl that just made a mistake that cost her a lot of emotional baggage.”
Conclusion
The goal of this exercise is not to rewrite entire chapters of our lives, but it’s a great way to see on a tiny scale, how rewriting a narrative from a different perspective can make shifts in how we perceive our actual memories/events/experiences. In a previous article, I shared how I rewrote the death scene of a dear friend who had passed away to illustrate the point that writing to heal doesn’t have to be a full-blown novel or book. It can look like the rewriting of tiny fragments of our lives to understand ourselves deeper. I hope you get as much from this exercise as my clients, students, and I have.
Want to work through this exercise yourself? Check out the free download I have available below!
I also offer 1–1 coaching using exercises just like this one so if you’re interested in how you can work through your real-life events/experiences and write about it in a way that’s healing — check out what I have to offer!
Free Download!
Three steps to rewrite an unhelpful narrative in your life and gain a new perspective.
{P.S. If you’re already a newsletter subscriber — you can find this download in the resource library!}
